Friends- We Were..!!!

"Please don't talk to me whenever I am studying. Sir complained to my mom that I keep chatting all the time." I looked around to search the source of this statement. A 12 year old guy in school dress with at least a 5 kg bag hanging on his back was telling this to his friend. The statement was a bit loud as the other people in metro also gazed towards the guy. Both of them in the school dress, probably from the same school & class as second guy was of the same age I guess. I looked at the first guy face, innocent I thought. Half shirt tucked in and half hanging out with some ink spot on trouser & shirt clearly state that they are coming back from school. Little hair on upper lips clearly stating he will step into the stage of stress in next couple of years. Of course after attending 8 periods in school you barely look energetic. The eyes were reflecting the maths formulas with physics theorems, waiting for two hours of his day to spend with friends on playground or to watch cartoon network. Suddenly I thought at which stage the life is perfect? Which one is the state when we are actually satisfied with whatever we have? Since the age of 5 till the end we just run behind things. First at school you have to run hard to get maximum numbers, then college to ensure you give it a best shot to gear up your career. Finally jobs…. They really suck. Imagine your boss holding the juice bottle or eating an apple and ensuring you are not having your lunch as if he is getting paid for that only. When we were at school we thought college would be fun? Of course not everyone is lucky to pursue with regular college to have fun because the competition is tough and on top of it some of us may need to provide support to their family on financial front. Then it’s amazing… But still we look forward to college to define our field. Where to find happiness? How many of us can actually look back and say great journey till now with no regret? We leave our school friend as soon as we leave the school. After a couple of year even if you see someone from your school or class you prefer to hide your face with the paper bag you are carrying or with the newspaper or you wait him to see you and break the silence. And if the guy was a top performer then of course you prefer to walk away ASAP. Same thing happen at college, initially you might be the best buddy but after passing out college we wait our best buddy to call us for the sake of continuity. If he/she is not doing then why should I do? Ohhh he/she has become egoistic. He/she didn’t call me why should I? Why? Why? Why? No answer we look forward for our future, our job, our salary. We are ok with new office friends who always look forward to kick on our butt. One single mistake which can make them hero and us zero. We smile but only to please the lady sitting at reception OR to delight boss. Doesn’t matter how ugly your boss looking you have to say “boss you are looking amazing”. Remember when you used to insult your friend in school for just an ink drop on his shirt or trouser? You were always ready to break his head if he says something wrong to you. But here for the sake of money, life, family you allow everything as if it is the only way to get heaven afterward. We don’t ever take in that there is no word which is YOUR MISTAKE. Its always Y… OUR.. MISTAKE.. Why we did it? We put the blame on the other person that he/she forgot to call me. We don’t think for sec even that he/she might be suffering from the worst when we were blaming him/her. Why not to say I still miss you my friend. I still miss your aloo ka parantha with spicy pickle? Why to wait for him/her to call back? He/She may be waiting the same way holding your photo near by his/her heart pleading you to come back. Come Back.. Let’s have one more cricket match with my bat your ball, my Johnny and your Sweaty doll. Let’s have FUN again on the playground, let’s fight for one rupee coin? Come Back Please…..

26/09/2009

Waking up early in the morning is really a tough task... Isn't it? It sucks when you wake up before the sun. The same thing happened yesterday with me. I woke up at 5:30 AM. I don’t know about others but for me its toooo early. I had to go for training & induction. Ahhh.. didn’t I tell you? Just joined 2 days back and yesterday was the first day. The interview went well and I was one of the selected candidates. Training centre is quite far away from my place so had to leave home pre 2 hours. My dad says. Y to take chances? So searched for my clothes went through the daily routine sprayed deo. While I was doing this my mom covered her nose with handkerchief SHE HATE MY DEOS but I love them. My brother woke up as if someone raised a fire alarm due to the fragrance of deo. Anyway rushed to metro station as it is more convenient then buses and you really don’t have to argue on the fair as you have to do with autowallas. I believe metro is more reasonable as well. Its been three years I guess metro introduced to Delhi city. A boon to delhiwallas, it look beautiful in the night as if an aircraft crossing over your head. But do we really respect what we have? Do we really care about it or we believe in taking out the benefit of our own? I saw some scratches on the lift while it was closing. May be someone genius lost pen and paper and tried to write something very important(for him/her) on it. I asked a question to myself as there was no one around to ask. Is this the reason countries like USA, Australia ahead than us? Dosen’t the strength of the country lies in us? What made India a country? Its people… Isn’t it? The questionnaire could have gone further thanks for the metro for coming on time. I boarded in as it was 7:15 am I thought not many people will be in the metro but to my surprise there were. Anyway reached CP. Though its most happening area but here very few shops were opened at that time, I looked at the traffic signal the moment I stepped out from escalator they were working fine for a change. Normally they don’t after 11 PM to 8 AM. Rushed to my bus stand as I had to board into bus to reach their (told you its far away). A few roadside shopkeeper were available, sweeper was doing his job. Anyway after waiting for 15 mins. Bus came. Not heavily crowded but yes leaving no seats free. Conductor came to me and asked for ticket in his jaat accent. I thought I should suggest him to be polite but his muscles stopped me to do so…. Good physique I thought and searched for change and handed over a ten rupees note to him. Few girls were looking at me from the corner of their eyes as if any alien is around them and about to perform a weird task. I looked at my clothes and asked am I looking good or bad? I think I was not at all looking bad and the deodorant was still making people look at me so no chance. After few stops I got the seats and the girls who were gazing at me were also gone so I relaxed. It took another one hour to reach training centre. The employer had arranged a hotel for the same with lunch and breakfast. I reached and saw a couple of known faces as they were available at the time of interview. Shake hand ritual got over and I took my seat. After a couple of minute someone well dressed entered carrying a laptop in his hand wearing a co. logo t-shirt. He adjusted the projector and started with a good morning. Till then the room was packed with candidates. For my bad luck no good looking faces were around me. One sardarji sitting next to me was the only one with whom I could chat. The inductor started with the presentation. He was telling us the great achievement of the company so far and some brilliant people around us were giving answers to his questions. I wondered how they know about all this. Were they so involved in the market or I was too busy to see this? Somehow the one & half hour presentation got over and the trainer from Mumbai entered into the picture. A tall, fatty and dark guy with a black color blazer on his body with golden ring on his right ear. Is it really gold? I asked myself? I thought he tried to wear matching dress with his body color as he walked towards the table. All the good morning/introduction/name game got over and we were back to the topic. For another one hour he tried to put humor into the training with some silly and good jokes. It was really getting bored as the presentation was taking so long. He made me spoc for boys to get them back on time from breaks and one other girl Aditi the spoc for girls(same job). I somehow feel girls still have advantage of being girls. I mean more attention would be paid to them may be because a man is taking the presentation or they understand things gradually. Anyone of these can be the reason. Bias is always there, anywhere have you seen impartiality??? (Question to boys) I was actually lost from training the moment this topic approached my mind. I was really thinking about the advertisement from government about men & women equality. Though this is to endorse of course women side but they should start encouraging men. They need it more than women. Don’t you think so?

Voice Of Heart..!!!

It took me more then a week to recognize this. What it should be called? How to name it? Its not breathing but yes it speak as an ordinary individual creature OR more perfect would be THEY speak as an ordinary human being. Its as practical as I am, as chatty as a girl (Sorry!! no other example actually suit here) and as real as anyone of us. Its quite unbelievable and classy people call it stupidity. Of course when you say that a voice from your heart speak to you OR you are always in a scuffle of arguments with your heart everyone would call you crazy.
Have you ever realize that you are not unaccompanied ever even not in the bathroom ;O) and you can not be unaccompanied ever. There will always be two voices with you, one will be directing you to the accurate way and second which is more influential, distracting you from the correct path, taking you on to the top of the dreams. Its always very hard and stressful to listen to the accurate one. The right one will be correct but puzzled very afraid and low confidence though the incorrect one would always touch the assurance sky. Now the question is how to judge which one is correct. You really can’t judge on the basis of approach as the incorrect one would be more approachable or I should say dominating? Do we have the scheme of moderating the correct one?

Life Demand Changes..!!!!!!

23/09/2009
Its been two days I am struggling with these words. Do we change ourself by our own wish OR its the demand from life to change....??? Being honest I haven't seen anyone who hasn't changed himself or herself. We change ourself for us? For Others? For Someone Special? For whom???? I think yet to decide this... I believe if anyone means anyone looks back at his journey of the life he can better judge this. Changes.. they break us a part, they make us to cry, they leave us shattered then why do we love CHANGES? Hope I will be able to figure out the answer soon...